12 tips to successfully travel together and stay friends
Last updated on December 20th, 2024 at 10:55 am
Best friends? Should you travel together? Not without reading these 12 tips to travel together and stay friends first!
Yes she’s your bestie or he’s your best mate but it doesn’t mean you are going to be great travel buddies. The daily rhythm of life at home is not the same as on the road, and you might find that friendship doesn’t last for long once you get going.
Having a few ‘agreements’ before will take the pressure off for both of you. Use these 12 tips to keep it together!
1. Agree on your comfort levels
What are your travel comfort level expectations?
Do you want to stay in midrange comfort or a backpackers? Do you want to camp half the time or must you have a bed? Will you take an uber or taxi or only go on public transport? Will you cook, or only eat out? What mix are you happy with?
Do you both, or all, agree on this? It will hugely influence the next thing to think about – your budget.
2. Agree your budget
How much money do you each have? Are you roughly on the same budget?
If not, it can quickly lead to clashes in what you want to do and how you want to do it. If a quick flight to avoid a few days in a bus is ok for one but not the other, its not going to always going to be easy to deal with this.
Equally, if one of you can ‘call home’ for more money and the other can’t, that’s a potential problem. You are not on the same budget even if you start out with the same cash.
This is critical to discuss to be able to travel together and stay friends.
3. Check your daily rhythms!
Do you follow the same patterns – are you both early birds or night owls?
If one of you is an early bird and the other a night owl, how will that work on the road? It might not, but if discussed and agreed beforehand it can still work well, especially combined with the rest of the checks below.
Are you going to agree to take turns to work in with the others pattern, or agree when you arrive a new place how it will work. Is the early bird able to entertain themselves in the mornings without getting annoyed, or, will the night owl get up in time to catch the 6am cheap train without moaning? Is the night owl able to do their thing later in the day alone and not expect the early bird to be out all night?
Work it out and agree before you leave – it will definitely help you travel together and stay friends!
4. Agree basic goals and plans
Sounds obvious? Not always.
What do you want to do and like doing? What goals do you have for the trip?
If one of you is only really interested in the freedom to party lots and the other is into hiking big time – is it going to work?
If you were too alike you likely wouldn’t be friends – its those differences that make the friendship good, but will they work when travelling together?
5. Agree on enforced breaks and on alone time – its a life saver
Agree to regularly take time out and go and do your own thing for a day or two, or a week or two if you are travelling longer term. This is likely to keep the friendship whole – and do it even if you think you don’t need to. Just trust me on this one! I have heard it too too many times and when I’ve suggested it to people, they have always thanked me for it!
Equally plan in alone time when you are still together or if you are on a shorter trip. It could be as simple as sleeping in separate dorms in a hostel if you’re backpacking, or, going on separate activities during the day if you’re staying in hotels or resorts. This is also where a night owl and early bird can make it work well if its agreed beforehand.
In summary – you don’t have to be together all the time. Better if you are not – it will save you at some point if you want to travel together and stay friends.!
6. Agree how long
If you are planning on a longer term trip chances are that even with enforced breaks you will change plans. Things happen – you decide to work, decide to travel longer, find new interests, meet others you want to spend time with, and so on.
Don’t lock yourselves into a year-long pact – agree on an initial goal like travel the East Coast of Australia, or the west coast of USA, or from Mexico to Panama, or for two months. Agree to decide after that if you want to stick together or do your own thing. Of course there must be agreement that its going to be ok for the other person(s) to decide to go it alone even if you don’t want to.
Equally, for longer term travel buddies – are you planning to work as you go?
If you plan to stick it out together then agree this in advance. Even if one of you doesn’t want to or need to work, agree that the other will and this will be the time at which you split up for a while.
7. Compare your pace
Do you like to go slow or trailblaze at a run?
You might not know but think it through and consider this as a potential reason for parting the ways if you find you don’t want to go at the same pace. Most people like a mix for longer term travel and that can be easy to work in. But if you only have a couple of weeks, this gets really important.
There is nothing worse than someone “wasting precious time” to the go go go traveler. There is equally nothing worse than someone “rushing everywhere all day and night” to the take it easy traveler. This really can be a major make or break it issue.
Discuss this well, or try tip 9.
8. Keep your itinerary flexible
This relates to how you like to travel. If you’ve got this far down the list you’re doing well, but the next thing to remember is to keep things a bit flexible.
You get to a place and love it a lot and want to stay longer. You don’t want to have to move because of a rigid schedule. So plan in spare days or weeks, depending on your timeframe, to allow for this to happen.
Sure talk about the things you absolutely must do and if they are things that you have to book ahead, do that. But keep time to flex between these things.
9. Do a trial trip
Take a long weekend trip together, or a couple of weeks if you’re thinking longer term travel buddies. Discuss everything in this list first and see how it works.
It could be another lifesaver. Better to find out now than later!
10. Sort out costs straight away
Use an app like splitwise to track shared expenses and split it out. Agree before you start booking anything that you will use a tool and each of you will pay promptly. Money issues can get very nasty.
11. Cut each other some slack
Not every activity or booking your friend makes for you both / all is going to be great. Don’t let it be a drama or stress about it. Have a laugh about it – thats what travel is about. Highs and lows and the lows make the best tales for friends and family back home.
Anyway, the next one is sure to be better!
12. Communication is key
Agree to disagree before you leave – and to openly and honestly tell each other if you think its not working. This can also save the friendship – and your sanity!
Make sure you are both happy to travel alone as well as with someone before you leave. You don’t want to be stuck on a guilt trip because your friend doesn’t want to travel alone and you have realized its not working.
That’s it! Those are my 12 tips to travel together and stay friends.
Could you talk through these things openly and honestly?
Did you do it without compromising your wants and without feeling worried or upset or even insulted by each others responses? I’d love to hear in the comments below.
If you can both say yes at the end of the process, then it looks like a good match. It’s time to book those flights!!
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